The phenomenon called Chanchal

 Like breeze you came

Like breeze you left.
In between you created uncontrollable tornado. How & where we met is forgotten but impact she has left on me can never be erased in my life.
In the blink of an eye another day is gone,
In the blink of an eye another week is gone.
In the blink of an eye another month is gone,
In the blink of an eye,You urself r gone.

I never met anyone so vivacious who radiates such effervescent friendliness and explosive positive vibes. It was shortest relationship I ever had & but impact is for eternity that would resonate in all my lives to.come.

 

when she smiles, it has such electrifying effect on me that my entire soul leaped with joy & bliss. Every cell in my being craved for her presence , listen to her accented voice, smell her fragrance, feel her soft skin, watch her sparkling smile. Her stunning beauty could freeze lightening in skies as she exudes royalty .

In french the expression is “Coup de Foudre”. Literally translated “Hit by Lightening” or in plain good old english it means” Swept off your feet”It happened always whenever chanchal smiled. With her Time lost relevance ..what a stunner…Absolute femme fatale! How come heavens sent their angels on earth

There isn't anything under the sun we haven't spoken. First thought in morning and last thought before I sleep for both us is essentially each other. She is first one in my life I ever said "I DO" & TOGETHERNESS FOREVER " . Never before and I doubt , Never later.

The way she expressed her affection and love was truly incomparable. I never experienced such bliss ever before. Life was so beautiful. Even before I knew it, I was deeply attached, & insanely obsessed. Her name became synonymous for word Addiction. She was Absolutely Amazing , Astonishing, And Addiction.


Alpha to Omega, Zenith to Nadir,
Beginning to End & Beyond. My existence was totally Her. If she was Sita, I want to be her Ram. If she was Parvati, I wanted to be her Shiva. For first time ,instead of waiting for fate or a miracle, I choose to work for it. I would rather take responsibility of everything than leave to forces of fate.

 

Then suddenly, my world came to end. All tons of endless hours of dreams crashed. She just walked out. Just like that. No rhyme or reason. Why ? I don't know. Maybe she was contemplating for sometime. But I don't know. I was too blinded in her love. Maybe this is karma . This is fate. Or this is my personalized hell . It wasn't just breakup. It burnt my soul. It broke my core. It bruised my confidence forever. I wish I can turn time back time & stopped our first conversation at just Hello, for this pain is beyond my tolerance threshold. I wish I can scream off primeval rage & burn all memories & dreams to ashes. If only I can.

People asked why I couldn't see the crash coming ? Ofcourse I have seen it, felt it. But when you are so deeply drowned in love, you refuse to accept truth. Sunk cost fallacy. You just hope things would disappear magically. You refuse to blame your partner. When you are in deep love, you go.colour blind & ignore all red or any colour flags.

 

Well, chanchal.,

Our relationships might be the shortest in my life. But u gave me unforgettable memories. U gave me reasons for me to wake up to see ur msgs, and wait for u to wake up so dat I hear ur voice and hope to finish my work soon so as to talk to you, wait for ur office to b complete so that again I get to see u...life was so beautiful and wonderful that not a day passed thankful to God for gifting you. You gave me confidence to take on the world coz internally I was so happy. What more...most importantly it gave me reason to believe in marriage. I never thought I would ever dream of marriage. But you gave me reason & confidence that a person lke me also desires to marry.



I think I'm finally got over her. Intense pain faded. Maybe even healed or hidden in debris & crevices of heart. For one week, the withdrawal symptoms were terrible. Its already 3-4 months. Call it luck or wisdom from all books, I gained in my life that came to rescue. Many suffer for years.

But hangover continues, I still feel happy whenever she sees my whatsapp statuses, I feel skip in heart beat at her rare reactions to my posts. For now, as I write this, she is still my favorite & very important (writing in May). But I think it's time for me to disappear into background and let some new man take responsibility of keeping her happy. But I really thank her for opening new aspects of my character which I myself never knew.

I wrote this intermittently. Now iam all healed and back to normal. Alive & kicking. Found my happiness core again. FYI.