League Of Extra ordinary Gentlemen -1

  League Of Extra ordinary Gentlemen -1

I always wondered why we like some people. Is it because we find ourselves in others? Do we find something we like in our life and we see the same  in them? Probably and very much possible. Here are two amazing people whom I happen to meet in AOL ashram  ,so I jam packed them in one part with other Extra ordinary gentlemen (EOG) which being part of next blog. These EOGs impacted my life in one or other way, either in gross or subtle, certainly in positive way which made me experience Life in more joyous richer and deeper way.  Consider these series of EOGs as my effort of appreciation of some lovely people whom I came across on this particular path of my Life. 

Vandy Vandier :

I was just reading this fantastic book world chess champ Garry kraspov  “How life imitates chess”  which is replete of anecdotes from battles on chess board. One particular chess champ “Tigreon Petrosian psychological profile caught my attention as first person who flashed my mind when I read personality of this man is Vandy vandier , not that vandy is chess player but the depth of his personality is similar.

Vandy with monastery boys in nepal

Vandy though South African citizen of Indian origin is more a spiritual gypsy searching deeper meaning of life. Traveling to different spiritual regions, trying to give expression to the inexplicable calling of soul through myriad ways  . His life is full of syncretism and eclecticism.  He is Painter-Philosopher-Poet-Writer-Blogger-Travel enthusiast-Spiritual junkie who dabbled everything including esoteric and forbidden substances. 

There are some people whom u meet who will repel u by mere presence. There are people who will brighten the spirits by mere presence… When you talk with this guy, you will feel as if you know him for ages. Its as if some ancient memory has woken up. Such is his magnetic personality.

Very articulate. Very creative. Very humble. Very mysterious like Sphinx , this Man  has transcended religious identity , who is on verge of spiritual cliff , before he spreads wings to merge into infinity.

His interesting take on life through his eyes can be read on http://brahmagyani.blogspot.in/

Now I wonder, why he stopped writing.

Commercial Break: Ding Dong..

This is the photo taken after tired day at mid night in  irani café on one of  the week days in city of nawabs” Hyderabad”. As you see , three people having whale of time guzzling gallons of irani chai for which hyd is famed for. Please don’t think these three are best of pals though their association goes back to more than dozen years.

Who says you need to have same hobbies, likes and dislikes or for that matter anything in common?. We three have absolutely nothing in common. Only thing that brings us together is we literally suck each others blood. When Garam Dharam (dharmendra) screamed “neech, kamane, kutte “, probably he had we three rogues in mind.

Cheers..Rocko-Jacko-Myself

Trust me,when we three come together , the event is like super eclipse where all three celestial bodies : sun, moon, earth coming together, which is not often. We meet in irani cafes. Pubs is for gals. Coffee days are for lovers. Real hydi man goes to irani café . No matter what ever your social status is. So also as pukka hydis we meet in cafes.

But when it happens, the result is massive explosion of destructive sadistic humour.,Laughter riot and over dose of Dopamine secretions.

Three musketeer’s slogan: “All for one and one for all”

Our slogan : “None for every one and None for anyone”.

We three involve in bitter back biting , cheap gossiping , slandering about each other. but the special part is that all these things get done right on each other faces, relishing every moment of embarrassment other party undergoes. Trust me, these 3 are the guys , every girls mother warned her about.

Rajoe the big Mojo : The poor rich boy , sits literally on crores of wealth but no access to cash

Jacko the loose tongue lafangey : Always in dilemma over on what he should spend his crores

Myself:  told u na, we slander about others , never about self

End of commercial break…ding dong…

Rushdies Rustlings: Part-1

Like  I promised , my dear friends, here’s dollops of more dough on Rowdy Rushdie. Many avatars are there in Rush but before I write more, lemme tell you..Rush is no blue tailed alien species from James Cameron “AVATAR” .Rush is “She” in Brat-like-He-mind-set with She-body set.(Simply put, she is a tom boy)

No matter what you ask , the answer is standard “IDK”..I-D-O-N-T-K-N-O-W. Well, didn’t someone say that Appearances can be deceptive? But on this case, only expression she royally carries is…”..I-D-O-N-T-K-N-O-W.-look . i didn’t know if her name is IDK or she is belongs to same league of Amir khan in gazini or Jason bourne in Bourne’s series ( my fav films) suffering from“ incurable Amnesia” and thus has forgotten her name. maybe somewhere on her body her name is tattooed. For quite a time I thought her name is “IDK” and maybe “IDK” is nick name for something un pronounceable like the following Russian name 

‘Varsonofy Panteleimonovich Krestovozdvizhensky”

She has many avatars. Almost like Ravana, many faces , many facets, many personas juxtaposed . One never knows which is true. 

IDK the sportswoman (When this 5 ft -50kg gal  runs twice the 5 kms and cycle 50 kms(minus 10), you seriously wonder if she is girl or lady version of rajinikanth? )

IDK the funny blogger ( http://randdom-e.blogspot.in )

IDK the humanitarian (check her fb dudes)

IDK the man-eating vegetarian (oops, just joking)

Thus IDK is certainly combination of RDX+ TNT+ NIMHANS+ SPCA ..now that’s certainly mega explosive persona.

Lost in Oblivion

Now for serious stuff., despite of all faults and flaws , she is girl with amazing empathy and astounding raw uncut intelligence. She is capable of making brilliant analysis in real time. Trust me, I was baffled at times and more often than not got intimidated by dazzle of pure grey matter, sometimes even bordering to bruise on my male ego. Throw her dozen disparate dots and see how she sees through wiles by connecting all dots into greater whole. Alas, she is just not in right place to allow her hyper creative imagination give a free run.  There is something more…what I said is stuff for world, some labels struck by world on her.  There is core of hers , albeit unknown,which is real stuff. 

Best part of persona is hidden beneath the depths of her heart. Now, this is what one should experience on their own (can u describe taste of water to someone who never tasted water? So even I cannot describe it in words, experience it at ur own risk). The mystery and esoteric stuff her core is made up of is something that I wonder if even her own pals have felt or not…now  the essence of those secret hidden spaces in her heart is  what makes Rushide unique, wonderful n amazing.

Controversially yours: Curious hate case of Reservations

Controversially yours: Curious hate case of Reservations

At the outset let me tell you all, iam no evangelist seeking continuation or abolishing of reservation in India. I just don’t care as I don’t need it. But all the time, someone provokes me and iam tired of typing same content all time. So, for once for all I will blog it and send the link to my supporters and detractors, for both I have no time..Many of my arguments may be wrong and iam open for correction and if any super intelligent human/Alien out there disproves my logic iam more than willing to change my opinion.

“Reservations are bad for nation. Reservation is not providing level playing field. Reservations are bane for innovation etc etc etc”

so many times I hear…so many jokes , so many snide remarks to killing of SC/ST chaps across the nation for just being born in that community…well again …I don’t care. Iam simple greedy hedonist.Here is my case for people who say India is backward and quality is affected by SC/ST reservations

1)    If at most 50% of reservations( i think its 16% only) are pulling back country , then what would it tell you about other super qualified hardworking intelligent 50%. What difference did they make? why are they unable to take country to steller heights?

2)   In sports and armed forces there is no reservation, then why did Indian military lose 1962 war and status quo in 1965 war and badly beaten in sri lankan crisis? Now don’t blame politicians!. How many medals did we get in Olympics since independence? Now don’t blame sports administration. We Indians have become masters of excuses and blaming other and never taking the responsibility. Lets accept it.

3)    There are no reservations in business or private sector. So how many Indian companies figure in top 10 off fortune 500 ? well only 4 in entire list of which two are PSU (which ironically has reservations). How many nobel prizes did India win since independence in all fields.

4)    Ironically ISRO which has some kind of reservations is world class scientific establishment which has captured imagination of world, How do you explain its success off ISRO, OVL, DRDO or Indian Railways?

5)    There are no reservations in Film and entertainment and publishing industry. So how many Oscars or world class cinema did we produce? Still we call our lead actor “Hero”.And still our hero never ages , never fathers kids, everygreen 18 year old How silly. ? How many Booker’s prizes did India get after all there is no reservations in writing?

6)    How do we justify atrocities and crimes against Dalits? Dalits were killed just coz he had audacity to ride horse on his wedding or grow moustache. What about subtle snide remarks they have hear on daily basis in cities? Still two glass systems and untouchbility exists FYI in many parts of india.

7)   USA which is worlds strongest prosperous nation. Even they have Reservation of sorts, they call it Affirmative Action for Blacks and Red Indians. Now why despite of reservation, why is USA most prosperous nation? Every country has some sort of reservation for its deprived or indigenous citizens .

8)   People are against reservations. But Reservations are everywhere in india but in different jargons like Tax breaks and tax incentives for business enterprises, ladies only seats in buses or trains. All these props work under same logic as Reservations

9)    I haven’t yet gone into core analyticalresearch data or history. Let bygones be bygones. But I want people to watch film “Ambedkar”stellar performance and movie.(Since u guys are reading this, i also recommned to watch Gandhi and Motor cycle diaries) And if everyone who is complaining on reservation so much , then why are they not abolishing reservations? why not entire concerned citizenry approach their MLA/MP and pressurize them to abolish this system? BJP has brute majority, why dont they do it? Why why ?

10)  I have no data on how many dalits have actually filled in Reserved category and what is the proportion of Dalits to Non Dalits in government. Moreover Dalit Reservation is only in government jobs and schools and colleges. Now how much does these sectors account ?

Just 10 points . iam not discussed of 5000 yeas historical untold inspeakable injustices. Iam not presenting hard numbers of data to prove or disprove countrys inefficiency is linked to Dalits underperformance. Simple pointers. Feel free to drop your comments  or email me..

PS: someone told me that there used to be Blouse tax for kerala dalit women and when she has to pay money to wear blouse. Moreover when married , first wedding night she has to sleep with higher caste man. Well, in sex there is no caste discrimination or untouchibility.Eh?

My Credo ...!!!!

I, the man with many faces

Each stranger than the earlier

I, the man with so many identities

That people say I suffer from bipolar

I, the man who speak so many lies

That I no longer know what’s truth or Lie

I, the man with many masks

So many I wore that mask became my real face

I, the Monk & the Monster, Calm & Chaotic

And bundle of all contradictions. Twain did meet!

Nope..!!!

I don’t talk pain

I don’t talk panic

I don’t talk turmoil

I don’t talk hardships

I don’t talk melting time

I don’t talk death & disease

I don’t talk pangs of loneliness

I don’t talk angst of separation

I don’t talk boredom and problems

I don’t do any of above. Either I don’t have them or I just forgot or I got used to my daily grind of life or I just don’t want to plainly dependent on anyone emotionally or give more energy to such unwanted thoughts. Neither I want Anchor or Roots.  I prefer Life with no Compass. I prefer Wings to my Soul to Soar with no beginning or end, with no up or down. Nor I like collecting anything be it memories or things.

I speak Fun & Joy

I speak calm Bliss

I speak the call of Wild

I speak joys of Quietude

I speak sounds of Silence

I speak roaring Laughter

I speak mysteries of Life

I speak of all books I Read

I speak of thrilling Moments

I speak touch of gentle Breeze

I speak endless dreams and Oceans

I speak all these every Spring, Fall & Autumn

I wonder what if life we live is nothing but a illusion. Self created delusion? Maybe life is too big and incomprehensible. Maybe human mind finds unknown scary hence it builds contraptions like society or marks nodes/milestones to mark/keep sanity. Nature abhors vacuum, so does human. We construct so many social systems and call it societal conventions to govern human life. Any deviation is termed either break-through or attacked upon. We let clock define our days and nights. We have nodes of habits at various times of a day. Wake up at particular hour, eat n sleep at another. Work in between. Similarly we have nodes on our time on earth. Education- Marriage-Kids-Retirement at preset time periods. Any deviation, either you are prodigy , visionary or anarchist or failure. Who sets all these rules?

Society? Society is the name we give to our

fears. Conventions are what stop us from exploring beyond . We invented nodes like Time,Calender ,n other  convention to reduce unfathomable life to human level. We make ourself hopelessly busy with vagaries of life to avoid The Life. Busy with work. Busy with holiday.

Now what if all these nodes dont exist? What if Yesterday-  Today-Tomorrow or Ceiling-Floor dont exist? Will we be Soaring in endless bliss or caught in state of perpetual confused limbo?

What is time? Your Time need not be my Time. My one day can mean one full life of some insect. Dogs grow into adulthood in 2-3 years and Humans take 20 yrs. Simple astrophysics says light emitted by stars we see are years old. That star has emitted light and we might've taken an month or year to see it. So star lights future is our present experience. What if star imploded and died. Yet after its death we see it as present coz of time taken for light beam to reach us. Past  (light reaching us) Present (we are seeing now)Future  (from stars view the beam is future event). Hence Past Present and Future existing in single moment.

Questioning again. What ? What if you are experiencing what you believe but not reality? You can see rope and believe it as snake which becomes your reality. Entire body-mind chemistry  (Adrenaline, Excitement etc) gets into gear on your belief of truth. Not necessarily The Truth. Maybe entire world is just a dream and we need to wake up like in film Matrix.! But again did you ever ask your self where does the dream begin. Its always in the middle (line from Inception) . 

Above blog inspired from my boredom and finds resonance from films like Inception n Interstellar and Matrix .

When Death Comes Knocking

“Life’s under no obligation to give us what we expect”

--Margaret Mitchell

March 20 was my birthday and that was the day i finished book on Death and Dying. On my Birth anniversary I was reading book on Death and ruminating on it. Ironic!

First time i heard of the book "When Breath Becomes Air” was in one of doctor youtube speech. I was skeptical in reading biographies either on doctors or death as i was more into thrillers and other genres. But something compelled me to buy that book. First few pages of book was routine life of author and nothing exciting nor enticing for my soul that always craved paradoxical contrary  elements of Adrenaline rush and Blissful Calmness.

Every birthday reminds me of my own mortality and that’s scary. I think, though not sure, keeping our self very busy with family and profession, not thinking mortal nature of our bodies and magically believing that we live forever and expert fully ignoring that from the moment we are born, no matter what path-profession we choose, ultimately we all share only one destination : Grave!. It’s just another matter whether we joyfully walk or cribbing, but walk we must.  There is no choice.

Coming back to book….

 “Breath becomes Air” is simple autobiography of talented 36 year  Neurosurgeon from Stanford who finds he has lung cancer. Book chronicles his journey battling cancer and eventually dies before he completes his memoir. Author philosophies death and describes vividly the process of cancer gnawing away his life. Paradoxically his wife would be in advanced stage of pregnancy. So as his life ebbs away from this world , another life, his daughter, is entering into the world.

As the author being a Neurosurgeon, book is replete with functioning of mind and its intricacies. Its amazing to know how complex human mind is like he describes a case where 8 year adorable kid turns into monster coz of hypothalamus malfunction. It seems just one “mm” inflammation in his hypothalamus made boy suffer from bursts of anger and excessive appetite. He started eating nonstop, hurting people around, becomes obese and finally ends up in asylum. All because of that one crucial millimeter.(FYI Hypothalamus in brain controls sex, food drive among other important functions.) Some brain malfunctions (Gerstmann syndrome) we read end up human ability to read or see or slurry voice or basic math or even wipe out memories. During one such operation he writes how as little pressure at spot in brain made patient immensely sad. Sad,for no reason.Now this, I wonder if our happiness and sadness we experience in this world is result of inner chemicals or outer events or both?

Author philosophically describes his medical practice as student when he first cuts open a dead body in following way which was quite impactful

"Cadaver dissection epitomizes transformation of respected student into arrogant doctor. You practise CPR on plastic mannequins. The mannequins you pretend are real; the cadavers you pretend are fake. In anatomy lab, we objectified the dead, reducing them to organs, tissues, nerves and muscles. On first day , you cant deny the humanity of corpse. But by time you skinned the limbs, sliced through inconvenient muscles, pulled out the lungs, cut open the heart, remove liver, it was hard to recognise this pile of tissue as  human."

We get to know so many words from medical jargon , understand doctor mindset,  doctor's dilemma when to make some difficult choices that involves life and death , where difference between tragedy and triumph was defined by 1 or 2 millimetres.

 "

Throughout his career, he plays the role of confident doctor and views world from commanding position of doctor but finally ends up as patient in the same hospital he operated his patients.  On his death bed, he gets dealt by medical intensivists, nephrologists, gastroenterologists, endocrinologist, oncologists, thoracic oncologists, and otolaryngologists etc who all humorously disagree with each other in treating him

Fragility of human life! Life can be utterly unfair. Healthy people can fall victim to deadly cancer. Heavy drunkard/ smokers can go on to live healthy life with no complications. Author Kushwant singh drank every day died at 99 with natural causes but BKS.Iyengar Yoga exponent who led healthy lifestyle died due to heartstroke at 98.

 “The tricky part of illness is that, as you go through it, your values are constantly changing. You try to figure out what matters to you, and then you keep figuring it out. It felt like someone had taken away my credit card and I was having to learn how to budget. You may decide you want to spend your time working as a neurosurgeon, but two months later, you may feel differently. Two months after that, you may want to learn to play the saxophone or devote yourself to the church. Death may be a one-time event, but living with terminal illness is a process.”― Paul Kalanithi, When Breath Becomes Air

I connect to book in some matters like, in advanced stage of cancer, his physical strength diminishes to extent he couldnt even lift glass, couldnt even sit without backrest for more than an hour. His physical ambitions like climbing mountains or run a marathon, now reduced to stand on his own with no support, just gain some strength. His own past, being top doctor reduced to weak patient being wheelchaired around by his father and wife brings him painful memory. 

Though i didnt die but i remember when i faced it couple of years ago. Lifting tumbler required both hands and would fall after few minutes. In peak condition i used to jog miles uphill but during my sickness taking 3-4 steps proved great challenge. Facing death realigns our world perspective. All unessential identities we gather on rat race in world will drop like dry leaves. Suddenly simplest things like feeling taste, pangs of hunger, few walking steps, clear vision etc give great happiness and hope. Gone are the days you dream Marathon, Scale mountain, vie for top position, buy new car etc etc. All gone like wisps of mist leaving basic survival a great challenge to scale.  Fear- Frustration- Denial -Anger finally Acceptance and resignation to fate.  

 “Science may provide the most useful way to organize empirical, reproducible data, but its power to do so is predicated on its inability to grasp the most central aspects of human life: hope, fear, love, hate, beauty, envy, honor, weakness, striving, suffering, virtue.” 

― Paul Kalanithi, When Breath Becomes Air

Michael Schumacher who lived on super fast lane flirted with death all through his F1 driving career but when was he injured? Crashing into coma while snowboarding!!  Life can be dangerously deceptive lulling you into false sense of security 

Finally in the end of the book, author's wife completes the book after his death when he removes his life support and slips into eternal sleep of death. 

Book leaves you insipid after-taste with mixed feel of sadness and deep introspection. Death gains centre stage as we question basic fundamental laws of life and death. Book definitely made me slow my life and look around questioning what and what not are really important. Life can be utterly fickle and fragile! Isn’t it?