CATCHING
A THOUGHT FROM BOTH THE ENDS
I just woke up from a dream!!
I just woke from dream and for some compulsive reason was
inspired to record this. I don’t remember all details of my dream but I
remember seeing some of old places and people way back 20 years or so. When was
the last time I remembered or thought of them? Again, never in last 20 years.
Nostalgia is never my very strong point though I carry some vestiges of the
said emotion or whatever we call it. I try and mostly not keep memories except
very few rare and those as well, getting deleted or erased over a period of
time. But suddenly out of blue, things which I believed I forgot came to fore in my dream. I think I never
forgot those events of such time periods, they were merely pushed to some
remote corners of my memory bank. Maybe we never lose any information we collect,
it’s just we over lap it with bundles of new information.
Maybe our memory banks store “All the information “
dating back to the formation of very first cell that made up as we call
ourselves now? What iam talking about now is MIND and furthest reaches of Mind.
Or merely of minuscule Mind. What about Creation beyond the realm of Mind and
Mind just being micro part of it? Mind boggling and Mind numbing. I don’t know
what to say. Words fail me, or maybe its beyond expression of words!!!
In my daily grind of life how often we go WITHIN?. Ever
even imagine to access SECRETS OF DEEPEST SECRETS OF MIND AND CREATION? What
makes us ,really US? All day so busy with conquering the outer world, filled
with fears and insecurities, Greed and Compulsiveness, Just going on auto pilot
of our compulsive deeply ingrained habits not realizing the immensity within ourselves.
Just living the life of INNER poverty.
Why and how am I writing this though i find this juvenile? Absolutely no idea! For I
myself all day keep lazing, talking nonsense with opposite sex ,reading
exciting books, and daily grind again. But again I say, I just woke from dream
and was inspired to put this on paper/MS word before I lose the mood of
inspiration or I just forget and get back to daily grind of life routine life.
How often we know instinctively the presence of immensity …just behind the veil of life?..we might call it Gut feeling or some 6th sense or something like that. Some events, films, books ,Gurus knowledge, certain times of day etc which knock us into thinking for a moment. For a moment we lose ourselves to the Creativity of Existence. As if things just fallen into place and the bigger picture arises momentarily from confusing jig saw puzzle of myriad elements of mundane life.
Certain films like Inception,Lucy,Matrix(or say the
writers and creative team involved in making those visuals of movie)..or the
knowledge of Saints and Seers who have attained Enlightenment …books by Jules
verne,Lee falk and others …all above films,words,people who make you wonder
that drives you into Silence of Awe?
There are moments in my life, esp during twilight times
of the day, when I can slip easily into myself, going within effortlessly,
where as if on auto pilot I get disconnected with the world outside. Where iam
no longer attached to almost everything that makes my identity as I/we/everyone
knows me as ME..Moments where I can feel almost , almost everything within. I
can feel my entire body,zooming through bones, flesh, blood, nerves, tips of
hair sprouting through my skull to exterior…feeling brain, chemical juices,
tips of bone…nerves enveloping my eye balls, mechanism driving my body to function..”That”
which jolts power into this body .”That” which gives me Life..otherwise this
body is mere dead body, a lump of carbon and other chemicals that decompose
over a period of time. That something which electrifies this body ,That which
is same that brings entire world to life. That what that is ,was and will be
which I donno but I know IT exists, which I feel quite often. That which gave
rise to single cell that brought life on this planet, that which brought entire
galaxy into existence. That which made this vast confusing jig saw puzzle of
life to form yet has a beautiful picture with mathematical precision when seen
with understanding and top view. Call “THAT” as
God,Existence,Life,Consciousness,Brahma or just that feeling and to describe
our words fail for Its much bigger than mere understanding of our limited
functioning of our Minds. All this feeling culminating with Moments where life
within Me trying to burst from puny body to mix with vast life outside. Moments
where I trying to free myself from prison body to merge with Greater “I”.
other
day one lady asked me if I enjoyed previous day party where we drank danced
with gay abandon…well..though I do participate in social celebrations ,for me
simple conscious movement of one finger is good enough to send me reeling with
explosion of joy than unconscious disco under influence of alcohol .
All this could be
my hyper imagination gone awry or something whatever we call it. Like I said I
just woke from a dream and am inspired to write this. For You and for Me.
First ray of light creeps into my room. Trance broken.
Hunger pangs seep into my stomach. I come into my senses and bat my eyes which
I didn’t since I started typing this . Again my worldly senses come to fore.
Check phone,plan for day, Daily routine grind begins.
